Outlaw Town

One waitress to another: "The town doesn't have police anymore because they voted them out. Yeah, it's an outlaw town now. It's awesome The people are raw there."

Do You Deliver?

Employees at a local place of business overheard talking about getting some dinner ...

"Does anyone deliver?"

"They all say they do, but then you call and nobody ever does."

Irritant

Group of seniors settling themselves around a large table in a local fine dining establishment. On one side of the table a man and woman seem to be having more trouble than the others. She says, "You're left-handed, right? You want to sit on the end?" Before he could answer, a woman across the table from them chimes in, "He's only left-handed when he thinks it'll be irritating to the rest of us."